Office Girl - Being Honest w/Husband

Dear Here to Hear you,

A co-worker keeps making passes at me. I hate it but I find I can mostly ignore it. What really bothers me is that I have not yet told me husband and i don't like hiding it from him. I am afraid that if I do he will either make me quit or go beat the crap out of the guy. What would you suggest?
Office Girl

Dear Office Girl,

Let me answer your question with another question. Which is more important to you, your job or your relationship with your husband? Hopefully it would not come down to you having to quit your job if you tell your husband. If it did would that be worse than hurting your husband's trust?

If you tell your husband be honest with him. Tell him what you feared in confiding in him. Maybe between the two of you you can come up with a way to beat the office flirt (without the fists) keep your job and maintain your open relationship with one another.

I applaud you for your desire to not hide things from your husband. This seems to be a dying characteristic in marriages but it is a key ingredient in making it work.

Busy Mom, Unexpected Company

Help! My sister-in-law is driving me crazy. She always wants to stop by the house and visit. He visits always turn into like 3 hours. I have twin two-year-old daughters that I need to spend my time on and I do not have time to sit and entertain my sister-in-law. I don’t want to offend her and she does not have kids of her own so I do not know how to nicely say I do not have time for her. What should I do?

Please Help,
Busy Mom

Dear Busy Mom, you are probably right in assuming that if your sister-in-law does not have kids then she is not aware of the tiring work of taking care of not one but two little preschool children.

Why not take ‘advantage’, and I do not mean this in the negative sense, of her being around. When she stops by and seems to intend to stay for a while then why not say. “Oh great, I’m so glad you’re here. Would you mind keeping an eye on the girls while I make them their lunch?” Or any other chores you may have to do around the house. Keep busy and keep her involved in the tasks at hand. Be careful not to make her feel unwelcome. Remember you are involving her. Do this often enough and it will probably let you know quickly the purpose of dear sister-in-law’s visits. It is either a) She thinks you are just sitting around doing nothing and would just love to sit and chat with her. She’ll quickly realize, by being involved, how much work you really have to do and will leave you to it. Making her visits shorter and further in between. Or b) she doesn’t have children of her own so hanging out with you guys is filling a void in her life. Involving her more may just add to her joy of stopping by for visits and hey, extra help for you. You all win this way!

Good luck! Let me know how it goes

H2H

Weary Daughter

Here to Hear You, My mother - God love her, but sometimes I want to say something to her without being disrespectful. She is always going on and on about how she believes in what this or that prophet says and usually it is general stuff. For example The other day she was saying that it was prophesied that Christian business owners are going to be blessed by God and their companies are going to be doing well financially. So I’m thinking of course that might actually happen. This happens almost every time we get on the phone. Some prophet said something on TV so it must be true. I am just not sure how to be a good christian daughter and give her respect at the same time. I usually just hold the phone out from my ear because I get tired of hearing about things like this over and over.

Any advice? Weary daughter

Hi Weary Daughter, It sounds like you are doing what any good Christian daughter should do. You are hanging in there. Respectfully not telling your mother off. However if you reach the point where you are avoiding calling your mother because you don’t want to hear the latest prophet buzz you may think about having an honest conversation with he.

Hey mom, I love talking to you and even enjoy hearing what’s up in the prophet world from time to time. But I am even more interested in hearing what’s up with you. Let’s talk about you for few minutes.

Who doesn’t like to talk about themselves? This may just get to be a habit of hers after a few ‘all about mom’ conversations. Especially if you show her how interested you are when she does talk about herself. Try it out. See how it works!

Sincerely H2H